Today I realised just how fine the line is dividing between happiness and sadness, and life and death. I had a blast at school today. It was my 18th birthday after all. I felt so, so, so lucky to have my friends - no, scratch that, I mean my BEST friends - around. They surprised me with my favourite cake. My other friend made me a chocolate cake... from scratch. They both tasted yummilicious. I was in heaven.
I came home. Lazed around. Then I heard something huge banging on the wall. I don't really know how to describe the noise. It was more like something huge and heavy tumbling down. My sister opened her door with her eyes wide open. It jolted me. We both heard the noise. Then my mom came rushing to us, asking what had happened. Then her gaze averted outside the house.
It took us seconds (but it felt so long) to figure out that the the noise came from the car outside. And it took us more time to realise that the car was my brother's car. When the pieces were put together, my mom quickly rushed outside. She ran so fast. I followed her but retreated to take my phone. All those images of my brother getting hurt or bleeding, or god forbid, dying, rushed into my brain. My heart died. I was ready to call the ambulance. Then I went outside to see my brother standing perfectly under the sun. No bruises, no spill of blood.
We later found out that my brother was actually sleepy. He shut his eyes for a tiny fraction of a second, and that was all it took for the car to go into the drain. He actually turned the car right, instead of left (our house). Oh, sleepyhead brother.
My mom had to deal with everything. And I mean everything - the towing, police report, insurance. All the bull crap a man should handle. My uncles (neighbours) came to help my mom. I was so grateful, but where was my dad? Was he really that shameful? How about that fear of losing his own son? Wouldn't that be enough to push away his fucking ego and pride?
Then he came home after all the mess had been cleaned. Then guess what he did. He blamed me for downloading movies last night. Because I had the Internet on the whole night, according to him, it was me who lured my brother into staying up late. Stayed up late, sleepy, accident. What the fuck, dad. Just. W. T. F.
My cousin came up and asked me if what happened was a warning. Well, I hope not. Because I am going to get my license and drive like a person who's lost her mind. Watch out. My 18th birthday was one to remember for the rest of my life.
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